Charles Caleb Colton, clergyman, author, gambler, sportsman, and alleged wine-merchant, graduated with a B.A. in 1801 and an M.A. in 1804 from King’s College. He was known as a gifted clergyman with an eccentric, indulgent disposition. Colton spent over a decade as curate in the town of Tiverton in Devon. He was then appointed to the vicarage in Kew, London. He left the Church of England and the United Kingdom after two decades of service, allegedly fleeing from charges claiming he was a wine-merchant. These charges were never investigated, and he spent two years wandering through the United States of America. He eventually settled in Paris up until his death in 1832. Colton’s estate consisted of a one room apartment with no servants. He was an incurable gossip, and he took this with him to the page. His most famous work, Lacon, or Many Things in Few Words, is a scathing analysis of political, religious, and social leaders. Among his favorite subjects were Napoleon, Samuel Johnson, Oliver Cromwell, and Nero. He also grossly criticized the entire classes of politicians, lawyers, doctors, and priests. His other works include Lacon vol. II, Napoleon, “The Conflagration of Moscow,” “An Ode on the Death of Lord Byron,” and in 1835, “Modern Antiquity” was published posthumously. Colton became widely popular in his time. However, he is known today for his many aphorisms, and is more likely to be found on an Internet quotations page than any anthology.